Unless you are a Kiwi (or an Aussie who understands Kiwi slang), some of this post may sound like a load of gibberish! This wasn’t intentional, it’s just the way it worked out. Hence I have now added a list of Kiwi Slang to the bottom of this post to enlighten you. Or amuse you. Or confuse you. This may be particularly helpful to my UK and US readers! But first, here is the original post …
I’ve had the weirdest feeling of déjà vu lately with certain moments or things sending me on a trip down memory lane.
To be completely honest I never gave too much thought to the fact I didn’t know who my biological father was.
The thought would certainly fleet through now and again in the recess of my mind but most of the time it didn’t occupy much space and I could go years without even thinking about it at all.
The fact that you live overseas and you don’t know I exist has always made the challenge of trying to find you just too hard. My mum told me a name once. Literally. I asked and she cried and I never asked again because I was too scared to upset her. I’m not sure why she cried. If she was overwhelmed by the question or whether it was a painful memory. It was always shrouded in such secrecy that I never knew quite what to think.