That is me. The anti-fitness queen. The girl who got her mum to write notes to get out of PE, who happily opted for detention if it meant getting out of it, who would pretend to be sick to avoid the high school sports day.
These days you are only likely to ever see me run if I am about to be run over by a bus crossing the road and the last time that happened I couldn’t walk properly for days as my legs screamed in protest and the muscles locked up in my calves as tight as Fort Knox.
This is how I feel about the idea of any kind of strenuous exercise which would be pretty much anything with the exception of walking:
But it wasn’t always like that.
I can’t remember exactly when things changed but I think it probably coincided with the discovery of boys and with that, the self-consciousness adolescent girls get when it comes to things that are clearly not their strong point for fear of looking like a complete idiot in front of the boy of the week. I have never been what one would call coordinated (ha!), my head was always a magnet for the ball, I was the girl ducking if it came her way instead of trying to catch it (heaven forbid since I would strategically find the spot in the field the ball was least likely to be hit to!) and somehow it ALWAYS hit me! It’s become a thing. I’m scared of balls (any male reading this, get your head out of the gutter! ROUND balls. Bouncy balls … ok, forget it, have your laugh!).
Moving on …
I remember being talked into playing badminton at high school by my friends (some friends they were!) and for some reason I relented. I should have stood my ground. I was the girl sunbathing on the tennis court while the more sport inclined of my friends played netball or whatever it was they wanted to play that didn’t involve me. I look back and cringe with embarrassment. Clearly I am a sucker for punishment. And there weren’t even any cute guys to perve at so really, I sucked at it and there wasn’t even any side novelty factor or eye candy! Not that my badminton
hitting missing skills would have garnered much male attention. Come to think of it, not sure badminton playing males would have been my cup of tea either, I was more a rugby player kinda gal (and married a surfer – go figure!).
I did however know how to do a flip on the trampoline! But um yeah, I made a red faced attempt at that in front of the neighbours the day after we bought the boys their tramp for Christmas. It turns out being 16 and doing a forward flip on the tramp vs being 32 and
doing attempting a forward flip are two entirely different things! All I can say is OUCH. And shame. What is it about a brand new trampoline for the kids making us do the stupidist shit, revisiting our childhood flexibility in our imagination and then attempting to do it like we are still skinny little minx with no fear and a lot more rubber in our bodies than currently exists? Admit it, I’m not the only one right? You tried it too didn’t you? Go on, admit it! You DID!
The thing is though, the older I get the more I realise that the only way to stay slim in my 30’s is to exercise. Now, as I said before, this is not my strong point (really Haidee? I think they got that part!). The most exciting part about this new plan is the idea of kitting out a new wardrobe. I bought some real (proper real, like real real) sneakers last year that I wore, um, ahem … once or twice? With a skirt cos that’s how I roll.
I’m setting a trend.
Ok, so clearly a skirt and sneakers is perhaps NOT what one might wear to exercise. I figure if I look the part then I will have more success with this idea of exercising. Not that I plan to run. Walking I can do.
Is it still counted as exercise if I am dressed the part and walking with a flat white in my hand (make that a TRIM flat white, cos ya know that would be more appropriate right?). Yes? No? Maybe? Baby steps people, baby steps!
This year I went into true hibernation mode. I just cannot be bothered and as the cold set in I got worse. I have taken on a lot of admin stuff at my work which requires me to sit half the day happily blobbed out in front of the computer with my little fan heater blasting me from one metre away (ok, half a metre) wrapping me in a cocoon of warmth and laziness. This has not been good for me!
I talked about how I was going to start my walking again in my post The 12 Year Anniversary – A Time For Change and I ah, haven’t. Yet. But if I want to wear a swimsuit to the beach and the pools like I talked about in Food For Thought Friday: Body Image then I need to get my A into G because summer is actually not that far away! We’re only 140 days away from Christmas (you’re welcome!).
I need to get moving! Walking moving. Bouncing moving (trampoline bouncing moving). I just need to do it!
Are you allergic to exercise? Do you find you are now at a point in adulthood that you just have no choice but to HAVE to do it? Or do you enjoy it and find it comes naturally?